Dream big.
Work hard.
Visualize your ideal life.
You can have a perfect life if you believe in yourself and take action towards it.
How often have you heard this kind of motivational talk from life coaches and speakers?
I’m guessing: A lot.
Whenever you feel something missing in life, you turn to these motivational speeches and videos. You feel pumped up after hearing them.
You think, “Okay, I just need to do this and feel this way, and then I will surely have a perfect life.”
It has happened to me often that I watch a YouTube video or read an article that is super inspiring. I feel motivated to do more, work hard, and get my life on track. This inspirational feeling stays with me for a while. Sometimes, it lasts for a few days. Most often, just a few hours.
Then, I go back to living the same old life.
Obstacles are part of life.
“Take action,” they say.
I’m doing it. But nothing is happening.
Motivational speakers make you believe you can have a perfect life if you do x, y, and z. But the truth is: It’s not that easy.
You do all these things, but your life either remains the same, or you make only a little progress.
Here’s something I have learned recently through experience: You will always have obstacles in life no matter where you are and what you do.
Why?
There can be many reasons. Each individual is different and goes through their own life circumstances. Among the several reasons, the most prominent one is that you always have people around you. And when there are people, you have problems.
As I said, every human is different from another. We each have different thoughts and feelings. Even if you try to agree on something with someone, there will at least be a few things that we disagree on.
Sadly, humans have to live with each other. We have parents, friends, spouses, kids, colleagues, and other people constantly involved in our lives.
So, even when you try to bring your life together and move towards your destiny, you will always have a bumpy road ahead.
Either you have to eliminate people from your life, or you have to deal with the fact that you will have obstacles on your path.
What to do about it?
Obstacles are part of life. As former Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius says,
“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
You can’t avoid people (or things) that come your way. You just have to live with them. As a result, sometimes, you are happy; sometimes, you aren’t. That’s the way life is.
What’s the solution to this?
The ideal advice is to choose the right people and eliminate the wrong ones.
Again, it’s not that easy.
Sometimes, you think a person is right for you, but they turn out to be wrong.
So, what do we do then?
I’ve been with many people I thought were right for me but turned out to be the opposite. I’m sure you have had such people in your life too.
Replacing them (if they are indeed replaceable) seems like a good solution. But it doesn’t make things any easier.
People keep coming and going, and so do the problems. I’ve learned that you can never really be perfectly happy with anyone. Yes, you might have fewer issues with some people than others. But they still won’t be perfect for you.
Life isn’t fair. It sure as hell isn’t easy.
But the sooner you accept these facts, the better your life will be.
There is only one solution to the “people problem.” It is to learn how to deal with them.
People are here to stay, whether you like it or not. In today’s world, you cannot avoid people if you want to achieve success or happiness in life. Research says that life’s primary source of happiness isn’t wealth, traveling, or freedom. Instead, it’s the sort of relationship you have with other people.
Master people skills, and you can be ahead of most people in life in terms of success and happiness. Even if you cannot avoid the obstacles entirely, you will learn to handle them precisely. If you fail at dealing with people, you won’t be able to do much in life, and that’s a bitter truth.
